Thư Gửi Bạn của Chồng

Sau một thời gian chịu đựng, mình quyết định gửi một bức thư đến cho một ông bạn "kỳ kỳ" của chồng, mà mình đã quyết định sẽ quăng cục lơ cho ổng nếu ổng vẫn còn chứng nào tật đó. Cha này tiếng Việt không rành mà tiếng Anh cũng không phải tiếng mẹ đẻ nên phải gửi bằng thứ tiếng ổng có thể hiểu được.

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Hi anh XYZ,

Although my English is not good enough, I am writing to you in English, as I know it would be easier for you than in Vietnamese.

Why do I need to write to you?

Firstly, I would say that you are neither my friend nor my family. I can choose to ignore you. But you are my husband’s friend. And I love my husband. Therefore, I need to tell you what I feel, and writing is the better way to communicate when we have some “language” difference.

Secondly, before I ignore you, it might be good to tell you why.

You told that you acted weird intentionally to me (or other people as well) to see how they react. 

This is where the problem begins.

What will you do if we react well, and what if we react badly? Frankly speaking, you make me feel like you are a mother-in-law in the 18th century, though you usually said that you are from one of the most civilized countries.

According to what I was taught, behave badly to people you just meet (not to mention that you do it intentionally) is not nice; gossip about people’s private life is not nice; talk/criticize without helping out is not nice; comment about other people’s education or capability (when you are not hiring them) is not nice; comment without using proper wording is also not nice etc. And if you look back, you would know which ones you fall into (not to say all).

I would be curious to understand why you need to do that in your social communication. What I can guess is that you let your pride lead you too much. It might be your pride, who talk to your ears: “You are more advanced and superior”. 

If it is true, what I would say is that: Don’t let your pride fool you!

Buddha said that things are different in this universe. Therefore, I don’t expect and don’t demand that people can act the same way. I understand that you are different from many people out there, and that is ok. However, I can choose to avoid hanging out with people that do not make me feel comfortable when I meet them. If you are my colleague at work, I have to handle you in a political way. But I don’t use politics during my free time.

I spend time observing you, too. And I hope that some days in the future I can see the good side of you like what my husband usually says.

In conclusion, I am happy to be your friend, if you want me to, and most important, if I do not need to suffer from your too much difference as above-mentioned.

Regards,

Bach Ly

P/S: If you feel angry after reading, it is exactly what you made us (me and other new people you just know) feel before. If you are not angry and think about what I shared, it is great attitude and I highly appreciate it.